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Dinosaurs are the best prank ever

What if dinosaurs were just a prank? No, this is not some Creationist ranting, but a genuine question about our Jurassic buddies. Have you ever seen a dinosaur?

In a museum? Those aren’t real dinosaurs–they’re just bones! And most of the time they’re not even the real bones but castings of the supposed actual bones.

It’s not a fair question, though. Dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years! Sure, that’s what they want you to believe. Who is this mysterious they?

Scientists? They have better things to occupy their time than making up fake animals–such as torturing real ones in labs. Scientists hate mice, so they have no real reason to start making up new animals until they’ve finished off Mickey and friends.

So, who? I don’t know, you tell me. Who would want all mankind to fictitiously believe in large reptiles which once ruled the earth? Right, the V aliens. When they come they’d like for us to be comfortable with the concept of reptiles in charge. Trust me, all those museum exhibits are just going to look like reptile pride parades to them.

The next time you give your child a small plastic dinosaur to play with, I hope you realize you’re just training them for their future reptilian overlords.