Whenever I’ve been placed in a hiring or casting situation, it always makes me sad what the qualifications actually end up being. Too blond or too smart are actual criticisms, if not legitimate. Knowing this provides both comfort and sadness about every missed opportunity of your own life.

↓ Transcript
BEARD: We have head shots of all the girls applying for the news anchor positon.

MITTENS: She's wearing glasses, so she's probably too smart. She's too blonde, so it's like looking into the sun. She has a sixth finger, but it's on her foot. Is there no one decent?

BEARD: On this girl's application under "Race" she wrote "to win".
MITTENS: Ding, ding, ding!


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