The Weatherman


I love when the local news attempts to scare me about the weather. It can be snowing an inch, and you’d think it was the coming apocalypse from the news. I get that there’s a certain degree of looking out for the public trust by warning us of the worst case scenario, but I think there might also be some sort of deal with the dairy farmers.

↓ Transcript
TEX: Rick, how are you enjoying your first day on the job as a weatherman intern?
RICK: It's really cool. So when do we make it rain?

TEX: That's cute, but I'm afraid in this business we don't actually control the weather.
RICK: That's disappointing.

TEX: Don't be disappointed. We may not control the weather, but we control what you think the weather will be! How does a blizzard sound to you?
RICK: We're going out for ice cream?

TEX: Sure thing, kid. Right after I deliver the goods to every lonely housewife watching at home.

AVERY: We now go to Tex Hale, with weather. Tex, how's it look out there?
TEX: It looks cold, Avery. Very cold.

TEX: This is the big one, folks. Get to the store. Get the milk. Get all the milk!


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