Tomahawk Chop

Tomahawk Chop


It seems we’re never quite sure how to portray Santa’s elves in movies. Either they’re oppressed minorities, ready to rise up and overthrow Santa at the drop of a candy cane, or they’re evil. The idea, I think, being that they’d have to be evil to subject themselves to such a life, because there must be an ulterior motive. Maybe they’re the ones making the cheap toys that break a day after you get them, forcing you to cry for a week. Stupid Gobot.

↓ Transcript
SANTA: What would you like for Christmas little kitty?
MITTENS: A tomahawk.

SANTA: I'm sorry my feline friend, but I don't think that's safe nor politically correct these days.
MITTENS: It's not for me! It's to use on that guy over there who texted throughout the movie.

SANTA: Hang on, I may have something more appropriate.
ELF: Would Santa like his war club?


About Author