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Tag Archives: Santa Claus

How Santa Does It

Internship would also work as a substitute here, but there’s always a way to get free labor out of students. I suspect Santa is running an online university of some kind. University of North Pole? Kringle College? ↓ TranscriptHOBO: Santa, you really travel all over the world delivering presents to all the boys and girls? SANTA: Ho ho ho! Yep. ... Read More »

Christmas Comes Too Early

Every year Christmas comes a little bit earlier, and it seems to be with a little more force each year. I suspect by the time my nephews are grown it will start in July. ↓ TranscriptHOBO: No, I am not putting up the Christmas decorations! I haven't even finished my leftovers! HOBO: Umm, did Walmart send you? Read More »

Santa Versus Mario

Some child waking Christmas morning to find Santa dead from head trauma might just be the most horrible moment for the rest of their lives. Remember that scene in Gremlins where Phoebe Cates describes finding Santa dead in her chimney? It scarred an entire generation just hearing that story. For shame, Super Mario. ↓ TranscriptJIMMY: Rick, what are you doing ... Read More »

The War On Christmas: Part I

This is the first of a three part storyline we’ll be running for the week of Christmas. I guess the genesis of the idea was Wikileaks, and thinking what could they do that would really outrage people. I think ruining Christmas would just about do it. From there, everything else was just a slight heightening of reality. And since a ... Read More »

Tomahawk Chop

It seems we’re never quite sure how to portray Santa’s elves in movies. Either they’re oppressed minorities, ready to rise up and overthrow Santa at the drop of a candy cane, or they’re evil. The idea, I think, being that they’d have to be evil to subject themselves to such a life, because there must be an ulterior motive. Maybe ... Read More »